thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Randomize
