Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
