i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
