p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
