This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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