If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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