Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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