How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize