i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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