okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
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