Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
