my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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