until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
