i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Randomize
