yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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