I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
