I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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