It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
