matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
It's official drugs can't kill me
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize