Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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