One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Randomize
