This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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