this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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