Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
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