Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
