There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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