I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Never underestimate the power of titties
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
