I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
