mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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