do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
