kristin has been a bad kristin
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
