I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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