did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize