I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Randomize