Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize