If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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