Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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