I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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