He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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