Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
