Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
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