Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Randomize
