With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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