the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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