Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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