it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
