they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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