If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
