dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize