Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
