Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize
